No matter what your official role in the production of the newborn—
whether partner in crime, sister, friend, et cetera—if you find yourself
in the role of Primary Support Person to an equestrian who’s a new
mother, here are a few tips:
Horse women are a tough bunch—we handle 1,200-pound animals
for fun. Chances are good we’d rather get kicked by a Clydesdale than
ask for help. It doesn’t mean we don’t need it.
Hormones are powerful things. Remember, this, too, will pass
and your darling wife/sister/daughter/friend will emerge, probably
with a new appreciation for sleep and amazing biceps. Be kind. Be
patient. We know we’re being irrational, but that doesn’t mean we
can control it. The woman you love (or maybe just kind of like) is in
One day she could waddle around basically wherever she wanted
to, and the next she had a baby who can’t go in the sun and needs
to avoid germs, pees every 15 minutes and eats for 45 minutes every
hour. The list of “can’t” and “don’t” for a new mom is overwhelming.
Do what you can to create a place of yes. Yes, you can go to the
barn. Yes, go spend an hour with your friends at the horse show. Yes,
go audit a lesson. Whatever she needs to feel normal for an hour or
two. She’ll come back feeling refreshed and rededicated.